fabio dos morangos

There is a handsome man at the produce market who will always help you select fruits and carry stuff, and yes, his name is Fabio.

He will also tell you that you're very beautiful when you're wearing a puff-painted mumu and cowboy boots, and he will learn English phrases such as 'I love you' and 'My name is Fabio' to make you feel at home.

In fact one day at the market Fabio passed me a folded note that said - in English - CILL. I LOVE YOU - and then took it from my hands and tore it up, saying 'Your husband must never see this.'

The market where Fabio works is called Sacolão, which means 'large sack,' something I would say Fabio 'has.'

But you have to love him. There's no resisting. He has these dapply, soulful bedroom eyes with dark lashes and this cadence of worshippa-the-ladies that can actually sometimes seem like actual awe and inspiration at the feminine mystique and have you wondering if your puff-painted mumu is indeed beautiful and timeless and able to bring a humble man of god to his knees and not just a cheap drape that makes you look unhappy enough to have nasty sex with a stranger behind a pile of root vegetables.

But seriously, either way, you have to love him. Not do him, but love him.

For example when Fabio told me with obvious equal-parts pride and concern that he had been promoted from morangos (strawberry section) to general floor overseeing and that if I missed him in strawberries it wasn't because he wasn't there, I felt genuinely happy for him. I bragged to other people about it as if he were my brother or my child.

Another thing you should know about Fabio is that he should probably be a movie star. I've been thinking a lot about this and it just makes sense. Not just because he's beautiful and semi-convincing with his BS, but because he's strikingly small.

I don't know if you've ever met a movie star like Tom Cruise in person - but they're all kind of small and look like small versions of real people. Which makes sense, cause how else would they fit in your TV?